What is it like to work at a foundation like Itaka?
– The topic of disappearances is very difficult, which many people do not realize. I remember my friends’ comments that I will probably work for fun, because what else can I do – social campaigns, advertisements… Now we all know how important social networks and good communication are. Social campaigns were the beginning, and in the following years my cooperation with the foundation reached a different level.
To contact the families of the missing?
– Yes. Sometimes I also meet with families of missing people. These are conversations that are deeply remembered. I remember the first case that I was very close to at the foundation. A 14-year-old girl disappeared on her way to school. Only her bicycle with bent wheels was found. It was late autumn, a week and a half later the frosts arrived. It was suspected that maybe someone had hit her, maybe she was lying somewhere waiting for help, or that someone had taken her away because they were scared. Before going to sleep I kept thinking: she’s going to freeze. And at the same time I was struck by the irrationality of my thinking: a lot of time had passed, she was probably dead. Some time later it was discovered that she had been murdered. Fortunately, the perpetrator was arrested and convicted. More than a year after the murder, a journalist asked the foundation to contact the girl’s family. I started looking for updates on the case and was horrified to discover that a year after the girl’s death, her older brother had died in an accident. I had no doubt that I would not call this girl’s mother. As a basic principle, we can do at least this for the families: protect them from further suffering, protect them. We also help to publicize issues, but we also raise awareness among journalists about certain things and respond when there is a need.
I have the distinct impression that some disappearances are highly publicized and even completely dominate the media, while others disappear silently and escape our attention.
– We have up to 13,000 disappearances every year. If one does not follow groups on social networks, but only follows reports in the mainstream media, one can really get the impression that these are isolated cases. In the USA, many years ago, research was conducted and the term “missing white woman syndrome” was coined. In the USA, this has an additional meaning related to skin color, but the results of these studies can be summarized in the thesis that young and attractive people – especially women with blond hair, blue eyes, symmetrical faces and slimness – are more eagerly sought after than others. Brutally: beautiful people are more likely to be sought after. It is very sad, but this is the world we live in; in the world of pictorial culture. This is the first aspect of the “mediality” of disappearances. The second is, of course, the capabilities of the family and relatives of the missing person, their connections, as well as their financial situation and mental condition. This is a huge shock, we cannot imagine such a situation until we find ourselves in it. Even for me – a person who deals with the families of the missing on a daily basis – this is inconceivable. I have great respect for these families.
In the US, many years ago, research was conducted and the term “missing white woman syndrome” was coined. Young and attractive people – especially women with blonde hair, blue eyes, symmetrical and slim faces – are more sought after than others. Brutally: beautiful people are more likely to be sought after
What is the reason for such a discrepancy in reports of disappearances?
– Sometimes it’s because of media interest. Sometimes journalists contact us, we offer contact details to three, sometimes to four families who need this publicity the most, and from these four we select two who are quite popular. Then we suggest that journalists focus on lesser-known cases where, for example, the family is unable to cope with the situation, comes from a small town, doesn’t use social media or can’t raise money for research. I remember the case of a man in his early twenties who went to work abroad and disappeared the day after he arrived. He was a single father and left his two daughters in Poland in the care of their grandparents. It’s been four years since the grandparents took care of the girls. We really wanted to bring this issue to the media, but the media didn’t necessarily want to cover it.
Why?
– Maybe it’s a question of stereotypes: did anyone think that maybe the guy wanted to run away and left his children? This is much more common with fathers than with mothers. But he was a single father and wanted to improve his life, so he went abroad for a while. Half a year after the disappearance, just before Christmas, we managed to cooperate with one of the big portals that published an article about the case. I remember one of the first comments: how is it possible that we only found out about this case half a year later? Exactly.
The boy has not yet been found. If we had been able to get through this sooner, perhaps he would have had a chance of being found? For many families, almost the only way to publicize the case and carry out searches is to cooperate with Itaka or other similar foundations.
How is this cooperation?
– First, we inform the family what they can do and how they can act. Even before sending us a formal report, someone can call hospitals, friends and check the missing person’s favorite places. The family usually takes these actions, but there are people who become paralyzed and react only with panic and crying. And you can’t tell someone like that: get over yourself, start taking action, it will bring you relief! This may be beyond the person’s strength.
Are there disappearances that, thanks to immediate reporting and publicity, are quickly resolved and the missing person is found alive? Many of us wonder what motivates a person to decide to leave their family or home. Many of these stories end in suicide, but perhaps not everyone takes their own life immediately? In the case of heart attacks, it is said that there is a golden hour for rescue. Is there also a “window” in the case of disappearances when someone can still be saved?
– The order of the Chief of Police specifies that if someone leaves a suicide note or reports similar intentions, the case will be transferred to the first priority level of the search. The best answer to your question will be a story I heard from one of the search teams. The lady left a suicide note at home, intending to take her own life. That day, her daughter came home from school a little earlier than usual. She found a letter, alerted the whole family, the services arrived, an ambulance and the police. And after a few dozen minutes, the mother returned home… She was in the forest, she wanted to take her own life, but when she saw that an ambulance had arrived at her house, she was afraid that something had happened to the children. For me, it is a beautiful story because it shows that we have feelings and instincts that can prevail over sadness, darkness and suffering.
A moment before, she was still hesitant, gathering the courage to take her own life. That’s why time is so important, regardless of whether it’s a suicide attempt, psychosis, or other cases.
How do you live with this burden? How do you get home after a day of work like that, how do you sleep? You probably have to keep some distance from it, otherwise you might go crazy. But it’s hard to sleep without worrying when you know someone’s world has just fallen apart.
– In an ideal world, we should have so-called supervisions, just like psychotherapists who work with patients. Unfortunately, we no longer have this option because supervision is very expensive. This year, for the first time in the foundation’s 25 years of existence, we had to shut down the hotline for a month and a half due to lack of funding. Every year we have to participate in a competition that takes place in the second quarter of the year. We shut down the line on March 1, 2024, and only returned in mid-April. Therefore, neither the number 116,000 (telephone for missing children and adolescents) nor 22 654 70 70 (telephone for relatives of missing persons) worked. Furthermore, this is the number that the police officer is required to provide to the family of the missing child or adolescent as the on-call contact number for psychologists, search engines, and lawyers.
And yet the foundation has no permanent state funding?!
– Yes. All official documents state that the hotline operates 24 hours a day, and for half a year it usually operates for four or five hours a day, because only in the second half of the year do we have funds for 24-hour service. These hotlines cannot be operated by volunteers alone. A qualified and truly professional team must be on duty here. The basic training for an employee of this hotline lasts three months. They are psychologists who also have legal knowledge, they almost know by heart the Commander-in-Chief’s order regarding the missing. Sometimes volunteers come, but only to support these permanent employees. Since the police are officially advised to refer families to our hotline, I think this number should have permanent annual funding without competition. Because there was one year when we lost this competition.
So what? The police are sending you to a number that might not even work?
– Recently, a police officer asked me if he could send my family to my cell phone since the number “16” didn’t work. This is a difficult situation, because when someone calls, how can I refuse? How can I tell a parent who wants to report a missing child on Saturday at 2 p.m. to call on Monday at 9 a.m., because that’s how the line works?
How can your foundation be helped?
– We have a call for a missing child and teenager. We launched it in March, when the line was shut down. All collections are on our social networks. We also always encourage you to donate 1.5% tax, you can also donate to us. These funds are fully allocated to financing the operation of the line and carrying out the exploration. All campaigns (and we do many preventive campaigns) are carried out pro bono.
When creating Newsweek Kryminalny, we had the idea of printing at least some of its posters and encouraging readers to cut out these posters from the issue and hang them at home, for example, on a fence or in a store. Who knows, maybe some of the families will be able to help in this way.
– Thank you very much on their behalf. Every help counts for them.
You can listen to the entire hour-and-a-half conversation in the series “Interrogation x Newsweek Magazyn Kryminalny” on Justyna Mazur’s podcast “Five: Thou shalt not kill”
You can read all the articles in the “Newsweek Crime Review”. HERE.
