The number of people who are humiliated and abused by their partners or ex-partners has been increasing for years, mostly women, but counseling centers continue to reach capacity limits.
Sandra*, a single mother, says she wanted to find a new partner and finally start her family life again. But the man she met and soon moved in with turned out to be a violent criminal. Sandra says he initially criticized and insulted her and isolated her from her friends.
From physical violence: “It’s not enough to just slap someone in the face. I’ve been hit so hard in the face that I have a black eye.” Sandra tries to hide her injuries, but neighbors and co-workers tell her about them. She’s thinking about breaking up. “But I’ve always thought, I have to get through this, I have to do this for my kids.”
Amazing numbers
Many women and men in Germany have felt like Sandra for years, across all social classes and age groups.
As shown in the recent Federal Status Report on Domestic Violence, the number of domestic violence incidents nationwide has increased from 240,547 to 256,276. Now, a woman or girl dies from domestic violence every two days. According to the Federal Criminal Police Service, 247 deaths will occur in 2023.
A way out of violence
One day, when her partner becomes violent towards one of her children, Sandra runs away to her neighbors and reports it to the police. After a long and painful process, she escapes the vortex of violence.
She says it would not have been possible without the help of the Women’s Counseling Center. “They provided a lot of professional help, as well as emotional support. They believed in what I said.”
Counseling Center Under pressure
Anne Leddin heads the mediation center in Stralsund, Mecklenburg-Western Pomerania. Whenever the police are called in for domestic violence, Leddin and her colleagues receive a report. They then contact the appropriate person. They advise them, provide assistance with complaints and court proceedings, and look after the children affected.
In the relatively rural region of Vorpommern-Greifswald, they actually try to visit women at home to better assess their situation and possible risks. “But we can no longer do home visits to the extent that is actually necessary,” says Leddin.
Her team is constantly reaching capacity limits and regularly reports overload. “We’re understaffed. We haven’t been able to fulfill as many orders as we should have for a long time, given the concept here.” Just a few years ago, they were advising about 30 to 40 clients a month, but today they often have more than 50.
The perpetrator acts as a protector of the victim.
Vanessa Reupke also knows this situation. She works with perpetrators in Wolfenbüttel, Lower Saxony. Her team offers courses for perpetrators to learn how to better manage their anger and conflict behavior. To participate, perpetrators must meet certain conditions. For example, they must not be drug addicts, speak German, and above all, understand that they are responsible for their actions.
So the program only affects a very small percentage of all perpetrators, Reupke says. “Every day in Germany, there is a case where a man tries to kill his wife or ex-wife. If our proposal can prevent even one of these deaths, it’s worth it,” he says. But that would require much more money and manpower.
Often times there is a lack of funds
The funding of the entire domestic violence support system, including all protection and counseling facilities for men and women in Germany, is very inconsistent. In principle, the state is responsible. Many projects receive additional funding from local authorities or are funded through mixed funding.
Almost all organizations must raise their own funds through donations and other means. Funding commitments are often time-limited. Staff report spending a lot of time organizing fundraising, time that is lost from consulting work.
‘Violence Support Act’ In progress
The alarming numbers of domestic violence are well known to the Federal Department of Family Affairs. For years, responsible ministers have been pointing out that something must be done. Minister Lisa Paus’s ministry is currently working on a “Violence Support Act” that would establish a legal right to advice and ensure that the federal government begins to fund support.
A Buddha spokesperson wrote: Panorama 3: “The Planned Violence Support Act is intended to provide an independent legal basis for a credible support system for gender and domestic violence. The purpose of the Act is to protect those affected by violence, to mitigate the consequences of violence and to prevent violence.”
The goal is to pass the bill within this legislative period. Critics now question whether it will actually work. Urgently needed is to improve the relief system and prevent further deaths.
*Name changed by editor.
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